Month: January 2012

“See, the angels are everywhere.”

Ayin Es1 Comment

That’s what Wanda says in the screenplay Barfly after a bum gives her and Henry a light for a cigarette. Henry replies, “It’s time those fuckers came out of hiding.”

So the most amazing thing happened here a few days ago. The art shipper came to pick up my work that is going to Denise Bibro for Detonate next month, and he turns out to be one of the nicest guys on the face of the earth. We get to talking while we are packing up the paintings in the truck, and many subjects come up. We get to know a little bit about each other and such. He’s an artist himself, a photographer, born in Germany, raised in Israel, lives in Brooklyn with his family… I told him about how this is my first showing in NY, etc. And just as he is about to pull away, he hands back the cash I gave him for his fee and tell me to go to NY so I can be ay my show. He knocked the wind out of me and I of course would not accept it. I regretted telling him I could not afford to go, as I certainly was not expecting him to do such a thing. He pushed and pushed and insisted he wanted to sponsor the trip, and if I sold the work I could pay him back. If I didn’t, then it was a courtesy of his business in shipping for artists. He said he did this at times when he had a full load, and he did.

I was just absolutely stunned, and even in the last seconds as he was closing the door of the truck, he would not allow me to shove the envelope of money back into his jacket pocket. he just kept saying, “No! It makes ME feel good. Don’t Worry about it.”

As he drove away, he rolled the window down and said, “I’ll see you at the opening. I’ll be there!” and he was smiling ear to ear, waiving goodbye.

I was crying, I just could not believe it. And all I did was give him lemons from my tree. I tried to feed him too, because he was very hungry, but he wouldn’t even take water or a banana or anything from me. It was a little frustrating. I told him the way to the best pizza in town however and I hope he went there.

So… I guess I’m going to Chelsea!!!!

The opening is February 2nd 6-8 PM!

Thanks to Shlomo the angel. 🙂

Friday and Self Worth

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Friday I went to the Learning Resource center at UCLA School of Medicine to talk a little bit to the students, most of them in their 2nd year. We gave them free pizza to lure them in and it worked. Quite a few were actually interested in the art and asked some good questions. I was even surprised at my own self with the knowledge I had on the nervous system and was able to hold some pretty intelligent conversations.

Then I headed over to USC to pick up my work that was at the Hebrew Union College. A lot of driving. That’s LA for ya.

Today I worked on and submitted my application for the California Community Foundation fellowship for Visual Arts. The deadline isn’t until March, but I just wanted to get it over with. I had recently applied for a smaller grant to help me to get to NY to attend the reception of my first show there next month, but was rejected, so I’m not going. I apply for things all over the place, kinda constantly. I do not usually get them, but once and a while I win. So to all of yous out there that think it’s not worth it, you have to keep trying. Eventually you will be awarded with a few. I can’t tell you how many grants I have applied for. Countless! And I apply every year. Before the NY thing, I had applied for the Durfee and I was rejected, and I have won that grant twice, but I have also applied for it at least 10 times and didn’t. So you have to keep at it.

And don’t think I don’t feel crushed when rejected. I still do. Perhaps more so than when I was younger. I don’t know why that is, but I do. It doesn’t last long, but I get pretty devastated on “rejection day” and just try to keep busy to get my mind off it. There is a LOT of rejection in the arts. a LOT. It’s not for the fainthearted. I guess you just have to commit to it, whether you believe in yourself in that moment or not. It’s like a promise you have to keep. You have to rely on yourself because no one else is going to go this distance for you except you, so it has to be important. Don’t let anyone tell you it’s a stupid endeavor either. It’s just as important than being a doctor, a teacher, a nurse, and it’s certainly more important than being a stockbroker or a politician. You’re not in it for the money or the fame, so it’s kind of like being a nun, so hats off to ya! Give yourself some credit and buy yourself a Hershey bar!

2012

Ayin Es1 Comment

Hi Ho! Welcome to the last year of the Earth! I haven’t posted in a long while, but as you can see, I changed the look of my blog. I went for simple. I had that old look since 2007. In fact, I’ve had the look and design of my website for many more years than that and I’ve been working with MJP on revamping my entire site. This is going to take a bit of time of course, but in the next couple months, be ready for a full on change after a decade of what it’s been.

Change is really hard. I never thought I’d say this, but the older you get, the harder it truly is. I am changing a lot of things this year. This wasn’t some “New Years Resolution” bullshit or anything like that. It’s purely coincidental. I’ve had to reassess my relationships, which was not easy. I’ve had to get my own self-worth in order and realize my goals. Putting things into perspective was like coming out of a burial site. I still have dirt and maggots all over me, but I’m walking up the road trying to find the first service station I can. I can see it in my sights and I’m flicking off the worms and brushing off the dirt…

The last week of 2011 was tough. I had a really hard time getting my act together for the show I am about to install tomorrow morning. Pressing, personal issues tugged at my energy levels and I had to tough it out and chug through it with brut force. Everything is finished, including the ERL site. The specimens are now all FOR SALE and can be purchased with PayPal.

Bioillogical starts tomorrow, with the opening on the 25th. It’s featured on The Huffington Post right now! Then Wednesday, three large pieces are being picked up and shipped to NYC for a show I am in at Denise Bibro Fine Art in Chelsea called Detonate. I’ve also been remiss in calling Andrea Harris about a show I’m participating in at the Frank M. Doyle Arts Pavilion at Orange Coast College in February. I got a lot on my plate. I want to do a couple of installations there. I’ve been wanting to do my blue shirt cuffs forever, so maybe Andrea will allow it.

Also, 2012 is slated for me to work on an entire new body of work. This new work is going to be a lot more abstracted than my most recent work. That’s what I’m going for anyway.

And I’m still working on my book. My Artists’ book, and the novel. Jesus strike me down now!