This past week was filled to the brim. I’ve been running around town getting shit done—no time for art. But I’ve been happy just the same. 

I had physical therapy and psychotherapy on the same day, and ran some errands. Then I had three appointments in Palm Springs the day after. I got a Covid test the next day (negative!), and got an EKG as well. Whew!

I also started a spring cleaning of the house. I mean a detailed, “white glove” in the nooks and crannies kind of thing. It’s going to take several days to finish it, but so far, the living room, dining room, and almost half the kitchen are done. 

My doctor ordered all my pre-op blood tests on Friday, and I went to LabCorp without an appointment, which I never do. I wound up waiting over an hour as a walk-in. I found out that it was the last day they are taking any walk-ins from here on out, so I guess I got lucky. I see my PCP on Tuesday to review all my tests and will need him to write my surgery clearance letter. Hopefully, everything will be cool and I will be clear for take-off. 

It’s hard to believe the surgery is just three weeks away. My first virtual pre-op appointment with the surgeon is this coming week. I’m excited. 

I think about how everything has come to fruition and feel good inside. I get to ruminate on it every morning on my walks. I get up before the crack of dawn and begin a one-mile walk around 5:45 AM. I’m also doing physical therapy twice a week right up until I leave. I’ve been doing these things for a while now, and I count calories too. But the weight loss is not evolving like it was. In fact, I haven’t lost any weight since the holidays. I haven’t gained any either.

I went through a big loss and gain when I went on that medication that made me sick. I lost a substantial amount of weight during those weeks because I threw everything up. When I stopped taking the medication and my appetite returned, I gained it all back and then some. Then I lost those pounds and wound up where I last left off. Now I haven’t lost any since then. Oh well.

I read that losing weight during menopause is a lot harder. Between that and all the meds I take that make me gain weight, perhaps it’s a losing battle. Or maybe if I wasn’t disabled, I could just run all day long and burn calories. I don’t know. All I know is whatever I’m doing isn’t working out too well. 

I know I should be proud of myself for losing forty pounds. That’s nothing to sneeze at. Sure, I’d like to lose more. I wanted to lose a lot more before the surgery—like twenty more pounds! That’s obviously not going to happen. 

I realize this is impossible, but if I lost seven pounds in the next three weeks, I wouldn’t have that horrible label hanging over my head anymore. I can’t even type the word because it triggers me to such an incredible extent. I would just be a regular, “overweight” person. I can totally live with that. I could live my life without so much fucking shame! 

How did I get on this subject anyway? I blame Jesus. 

Really, I don’t care. I’ve been feeling pretty great otherwise. I’m no longer diabetic. I don’t have Covid. I’m decluttering my house. And I’m getting the surgery I’ve been wanting for half my life. Everything else can suck it.

By the way, speaking of decluttering, I’m also about to downsize my art collection. I don’t know how many readers I have here…I know I have a lot of visitors, but active readers? No idea. Point being, I don’t think I can sell the art I own. I mean, I could if I wanted to wait it out, but I don’t. So, I’m thinking about giving it away to people that genuinely appreciate it. I’ll probably be doing this, mostly via this blog. 

I suppose I’ll start posting pictures, one at a time. I live way out here in the boonies, and I’ll be recovering for a while, so if you’re patient and willing to pay for the shipping expenses, maybe you’ll be interested in the work I offer. It is an excellent way to start your art collection if you don’t have one yet. 

Off the top of my head, I’m thinking about starting off with a small Anne Grgich piece and maybe a larger abstract painting by Rob Abeyta Jr. I’ll post them soon.

Who is interested?