My Story

This is my official statement. Please make sure your tape recorders are on.

My name is Ayin Es. I recently changed it from Carol Es. I grew up in Los Angeles, the greatest city in the world. I am an artist with physical and mental disabilities, and a rape survivor. I identify as transqueer, or a non-binary person. But none of those things define every dimension of who I am.

I have been a musician and an artist my entire life. As a drummer, I've toured the U.S. and Canada, and performed for large audiences, played groove/R&B/Hip Hop, jazz, rock n' roll, and studied with notable drummers, musicians, and producers. Everyone I have ever known has influenced me in some way in all my artistic endeavors. Some of my biggest influences are the Beatles, Prince, Stevie Wonder; Paul Klee, van Gogh, Amy Sillman, and others.

Earlier in life, I worked as a cutter in the garment industry with my family beginning at age eleven. I left home by fifteen because of ongoing mental and sexual abuse. However, I continued to work part-time for the family business until I was twenty-three, as well as every other job on earth you can think of to support myself.

By the time I was ten, my family moved more than a dozen times, so I wound up without a formal education. I picked up the slack by educating myself at the public library and got my GED at nineteen.

In my teens, I discovered Charles Bukowski at the library and I owe a lot to his genius. I became a writer and a more determined artist because of him. I also love John Fante and Miranda July. I write in various genres and have been published in a few small presses.

Along with making art, I also create Artist's books. They've been widely collected and placed in major collections around the world, which is just plain weird, but I guess I got lucky.

Over the years, many happy people have purchased my artwork and I've collected a few testimonials here, in case you don't believe me.

If you're a gallery or a curator, here is a more professional-type artist's statement for your files.

Thanks for reading and I hope I passed the mustard, I know what I mean.